


Yuki

by shrill_linguini



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Akaashi loves bokuto a lot, Angst, Angst and Feels, Hospitalization, Hospitals, Implied/Referenced Character Death, It gets kinda sad im lowkey not sorry, Kind of college au except not really, Kuroo is mentioned like 5 times, M/M, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-17
Updated: 2018-08-17
Packaged: 2019-06-28 12:22:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15707148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shrill_linguini/pseuds/shrill_linguini
Summary: This was a sort of one shot I had sitting in my Google Drive, and I really wanted to post it. I hope you enjoy!





	Yuki

**Author's Note:**

> This was a sort of one shot I had sitting in my Google Drive, and I really wanted to post it. I hope you enjoy!

_The city looks so beautiful from way up here._ The snow fell ever so carefully, like feathers falling from an angel’s wings. It was barely mid-afternoon and the sky was already dark, much like it usually is this time of year. I placed my hand against the window, goosebumps running up my arm from it’s cool temperature.

Behind me, I heard a door open and close; but I didn’t bother to turn around. “I got you a cup of hot chocolate and some pastries.” I heard some rustling, a jacket unzipping, and paper tearing. “Why are you out of bed.”

I smiled, removing my hand from the cold glass. “I feel fine, Akaashi.” I slowly shuffled back to the hospital bed, Akaashi supporting me. “The nurses said it would be good if I got up and walked around for a bit.” I sat up, Akaashi handing me the cup of hot chocolate. Taking a sip, I smiled to myself. “I’ve counted five cop cars in the last hour.”

“Maybe Kuroo burned down the apartment.” Akaashi mumbled, sitting on the edge of the bed. “Did they give you a date for when you could go home?”

I nodded, looking at the styrofoam cup in my hands. “They want to run another scan or something in the morning, but they told me after that I could go home.” I began to bring the cup to my lips, but stopped before it made contact. “Hey, Akaashi?”

“Hmm?”

“Do they miss me?” Akaashi raised an eyebrow, making me realize how vague the question was. “The volleyball team?”

Akaashi cleared his throat, resting his elbows on his knees. “Yeah, they do.” A smile tugged at his lips. “It’s weird, not having your energetic personality lifting everyone’s spirits.”

“I remember you saying you find it annoying.”

Akaashi let out a nervous laugh. “I did, but now nothing’s the same.” He sat up and looked at me. “But you’ll come back and everything will be back to the way it was.”

I smiled at his words. _‘Back to the way it was.’ Back to normal._

_After these past few weeks, I’ve learned that I have a hard time staying still. The nurses told me constantly that I needed to stay still every time I had a scan done, but it was difficult for me. I would start thinking about how Akaashi would come and visit me every day since I ended up here. I slowly started to notice that he didn’t like change. I don’t blame him. From what he’s told me, almost everything has changed since the day I was admitted. I started to realize, I didn’t like change either. It was different for me, though. Akaashi knew how I was before, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t remember how I used to be._

_When I was admitted a few weeks ago, a stranger walked into my room, acting like he knew me. He sat down and talked to me, telling me that he was my teammate from my college volleyball team. The more he talked to me, the more I started to feel like myself. Well, what I’d like to believe was myself._

“Move over!”

The loud voice startled me from my thoughts. I looked up to see a man dressed in business attire, moving to hold onto the handle to avoid stumbling when the train would come to a stop.

“Sorry about that.” Akaashi said, gently grabbing my arm, pulling me towards him.

I looked at the man, then back at Akaashi. “What did I do wrong?”

“Nothing, some people are just assholes.” He replied. “I’m sorry I couldn’t drive you, Kuroo has the car.” Akaashi said, looking at me from the corner of his eye.

“Kuroo? He’s our roommate, right?” I asked quietly, hoping he hadn’t heard me if I was wrong.

“Yeah, he’s just like you! I don’t know how I deal-” Akaashi stopped himself halfway through his sentence. "Well, you two used to be the same."

I barely caught that last part.

★

“Kuroo! We’re home!” Akaashi yelled as he opened the door to the apartment he told me we shared. He unzipped his jacket, hanging it on the coat rack before taking my bags from me, heading down the hallway.

Keeping my head down, I followed him down the hallway into a bedroom. I looked around, my eyes focusing on a nightstand next to the bed. I involuntarily walked over and sat down on the bed, picking up a picture frame that was placed next to the alarm clock. It was a picture of me and Akaashi, we had an arm around one another and I had a big smile on my face. For some reason, I turned the  picture frame over and written on the back was:

_Bokuto and Akaashi, Bokuto’s graduation 2014_

I could feel someone’s eyes on me and I looked up, seeing Akaashi watching me. “Oh, was I not supposed to touch this? I can put it back-”

Akaashi let out a laugh. “This is your room, Bokuto. These are your things.”

“My room?” I placed the picture back on the nightstand and pulled my legs up on the bed. I ran my hand over the comforter, looking up at Akaashi. “I only noticed two bedrooms...where do you sleep?”

Akaashi scratched his head, leaning against the doorway. “Usually on the couch, I’m not over here too often.”

I nodded and rubbed my eyes with the back of my hands. “I’m really tired…”

“Take a nap, I’ll be in the living room if you need me. You don’t feel sick? Your head doesn’t hurt? Dizzy? Lightheaded?” I shook my head. Akaashi nodded, pulling the door closed.

I moved to lay on my side, grabbing one of the pillows and holding it close to me. I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath in. The smell that lingered on the fabric seemed all too familiar.

* * *

**_ Akaashi _ **

 While Bokuto napped, I was curled up on the couch, reading a book. I got comfortable, the apartment growing eerily quiet, until I heard the floor creak. I looked over my shoulder and Bokuto was standing in the hallway, clutching a stuffed animal. “Bokuto?” I placed the book next to me and stood up. “Is everything alright?”

He nodded, looking at the stuffed animal in his hands, it was a teddy bear from when he was a kid. He’s kept it all these years. “This, this is mine.” he said quietly, referring to the bear in his hands.

I nodded without saying a word.

He smiled, I could tell he felt proud of himself. “I remember...it smells just like it did when I was little.” Bokuto looked up at me, the smile falling from his face. “I still don’t remember a lot of things, I’m scared I won’t ever remember.”

I felt my heart stop. This wasn’t Bokuto. Bokuto doesn’t get scared, he’s not afraid of the unknown. He dives into the unknown, head first, his curiosity getting the better of him. This wasn’t the Bokuto I know and love, this is someone totally different. I swallowed the lump that was forming in my throat, looking towards Bokuto. "Everything will be fine, you'll be fine. I promise."

Bokuto walked towards me, holding out his hand, his pinky sticking out. "Pinky promise, Akaashi?"

A smile tugged at my lips and I nodded, wrapping my pinky around his. "Promise."

_His hands were cold._  

★

_I forgot how uncomfortable this couch was._  

I barely slept for more than an hour before my back started to hurt. My muscles ached and it was difficult for me to push myself to a sitting position. I picked up my phone off the table and the time read back "3:27am." Locking my phone, I set it back on the table and rubbed my eyes. Just as I was about to lay back down, I heard a loud crash coming from the kitchen. My instincts kicking in, I jumped to my feet, groping the wall blindly in the dark to search for the light switch. Once I found it, I flicked it on and across the room, I met the eyes of a startled Bokuto. "You scared me half to death...what on earth are you doing?"

"S-sorry," he mumbled, bowing his head. I noticed he was holding the bear he had yesterday in his arms. "I wanted a glass of water."

I let out a sigh, walking into the kitchen. "You could have just woken one of us up." I stood on my toes to reach a glass in the cabinet, filling it with water from the tap.

"I didn't want to disturb you..." Bokuto took the glass from me, holding it in both of his hands.

"Well, you can wake me up whenever you need. I don't mind. Kuroo might gouge your eyes out, but I won't." I said reassuringly.

Bokuto smiled shyly, taking a sip. "Thank you."

I nodded and headed back to my makeshift bed on the couch. I picked up the blanket, noticing Bokuto was still standing in the hallway. "Do you need something else?"

"Can you...can you lay with me?"

I looked at him for a minute, memories from when we were in high school flooding back to me all at once. Bokuto can't fall asleep if his mind won't let him, he's over-thinking about something and making himself anxious to the point where he's not sleeping. "Yeah, of course." Leaving my makeshift bed behind, I followed him back into his room. One side of his bed was completely untouched, my side. I crawled into bed, settling into the mattress. _Holy shit this felt amazing._ I watched as Bokuto slowly got back under the covers, holding the blanket close to him. I rested my head on the pillow and looked at him, he didn't make eye contact with me. "Bokuto,"

His eyes met mine through the darkness, showing me I had his attention.

"Are you okay?"

Bokuto nodded, shifting slightly in his spot.

"Okay, get some sleep." I gave him a small smile before closing my eyes, rolling over to face the wall.

Just as sleep was about to wash over me, I felt something nudge against my back. I rolled over and noticed Bokuto had moved closer to me. Carefully, I draped my arm over him, around his shoulders. Bokuto moved closer to me, nuzzling into my chest. I could hear him breathing, I could feel his heartbeat.

_My Bokuto._  

_"_ Smells just like you." Bokuto mumbled against my chest.  

I moved to try and look at him. "Hmm? What was that?"

"My pillows, they smell like you." 

I couldn't help but stifle a laugh. 

Bokuto looked up at me, his bottom lip sticking out. "What's so funny, Akaashi?"

Shaking my head, I held him closer. "Nothing, absolutely nothing." Nuzzling into his hair, I closed my eyes, a smile growing on my face.

_My Bokuto._

* * *

 

 "I really wish you could have seen today's match, Bokuto! It was great, we won both sets!" I was so excited to talk to him again. "One of the guys on the other team got hit square in the face with a volleyball, you would have loved it." I looked at Bokuto laying in the bed, lifeless. His eyes were closed, his lips slightly chapped. Growing quiet, I awaited a response from him. I immediately knew I wasn't going to get a response out of him, but deep down, I kept thinking I would.

His chest rose and fell slowly as he inhaled and exhaled, his lungs slowly giving up. Carefully, I held his hand in both of mine.

_His hands were cold._

I looked over my shoulder, making sure no nurses or doctors were going to be entering his room any time soon. Once I was certain, I removed my hand from his and leaned forward, carefully placing my head against his chest, a kiss on his cold skin.

_I could hear him breathing, I could feel his heartbeat. My Bokuto._

★

Shoving my gloved hands in my pockets, I took a deep breath of frigid air. I looked down at my shoes, surrounded by snow covered grass. Clearing my throat, I looked at the headstone with his name on it. "My Bokuto..." I placed my hand on the headstone, smiling slightly.

The snow fell ever so carefully, like feathers falling from an angel's wings.

  
_I bet the city looks so beautiful from way up there._


End file.
